Uschilini

Thermal Twists

A twisting sequence to drop into opening space in the side ribs, in prep for deeper twisting and arm balancing.

Note: Parsvokanasana is also known as Prayer Twist. Pashasana is a name for twisting Utkatasana with the hands in Namaste at the heart.

Utkatasana
Pashasana to the Rt. (exhale)
Step left foot back to Parsvokonasana(inhale)-hold 3 cycles of breath
Step left foot forward, inhale into Utkatasana
Pashasana to the left (exhale)
Step right foot back to Parsvokonasana(stepping on the inhale)-hold 3 cycles of breath
Step right foot forward, inhale into Utkatasana

I like to do this sequence at least 3 times to generate heat and awareness in the side ribs, cultivate dropping into the hips, connecting to the lines of support in the legs in Parsvokonasana, connecting the line from the back heel into the heart and the crown here.

I remind myself to breathe into the low back as I come in and out of chair (Utkatasana)-this reminds me to drop into my root more as I settle through the tailbone.

At the end of the last utkatasana I dove forward into Uttanasana, and step back to down dog.
Vinyasas begin as you like from there.

The Look of Love

This mornings I showed up to teach ‘the movement of change’, my series on cultivating strength for a Vinyasa practice-inspired by my experience of the teacher training.

I feel so re-empowered to share whats coming through, like my lens just got cleaned with windex instead of dishwater! I’ve spent alot of time ‘rushing’ the practice I teach.

When I first began, I was trying to squeeze so much into the 1 1/2 hour class-I always became flustered after my standing Asana sequence ended to discover I barely had time to wind the class down, and then take Savasana. Or, I spend so much time in variations of the core sequence (to keep the pace up), I feel like the class didn’t really absorb what my message was.

This all comes down to VALUE.

Since I started teaching-the thing that faces me with the clearest, piercing gaze, is my self-worth.

I was faced as I began to study Yoga intently with how little I posess, and in the last couple years-the sharp image of what it/I  should look like.

This goes back to what repelled me from Yoga in the first place.

I felt so excluded from what a ‘Yogini’ is-there was just one more group I’d never fit in to. I’d never really felt accepted, or appreciated in a peer group, especially in Ojai.

When I met Kira this changed for me. I finally felt I had met a teacher, and a friend, who wasn’t going to make me feel ‘other’ because I had a different style, or short hair and tattoos. In fact-she appreciated and encouraged me to explore all the things that called to me. She saw the ‘potential’ in my creativity, and she wasn’t afraid to let me explore it as part of her crew.

Years later, our teacher Uma talks about just this. As I’ve cultivated seeing deep-I can realate to Uma’s quote of Ramana Maharishi-That a real Yogi has the ability to see the great potential in all things.

Last nights homework assignment was to chart your Yoga family tree. We all seemed to recognize how we ‘returned’ to where we began. Where my tree started with Krishnamurti-I realized it went even farther back to where my Mom met Krishnamurti in 1960.

Threading my roots here all the way back to those days is so fun. It encourages me to keep going into the great mystery ahead.

As far as my self doubts go, they seem dwarfed in the face of this infinite synchronicity, infinate possibility. I just keep on going.

My Yoga Family Tree

Today’s homework was to chart your Yoga ‘Family Tree’ and to create a sequence to share with class tomorrow.

The two are definately relative for me-they’re two parts of a very clear tablet-that I am deciphering, or being given the ‘rosetta stone’ to.

As I started mapping out my Yoga-I got inspired to share my family tree in photos, so the slideshow above gives you an idea…

Part of my practice is to chart my dreams. I write about them in my blogs, and I feel them ripple into my Asana practice as I am guided in rythems through my body, or in what I teach.

My dream of the past night was pretty ‘dull’, except for it’s powerful message.
Usually I see intense colors, dramatic effects or symbolism..I have a very active imagination.

The dream revealed my friend and teacher Kira was pregnant. We were having a connecting discussion, and she was sharing her fears and doubts over what she was ‘baking’, and that I was welcome to come and hold the teacher space with her, and in her absence.

This was a clear message of ‘self acknowledgment’ and ‘self acceptence’, which are the challenging yoga of my practice right now (and well, forever).

I’ve always been awed by the ability of my friends, and had many doubts about my own. The thread of dreams I’ve had during this last ‘manifestation’ period are mirroring a powerful, deep sense of shift-that I am growing confident, trusting, and rooted in my power.

As I stepped into the frame of ‘teaching’ in the dream, it was an effortless leap.

I had fallen asleep last night with the mantra from a favorite old house music song of mine
‘you are beautiful; you are perfect; just the way you are’

I think I am starting to believe it.

Passage

Last nights dream marked the passing of something HUGE.
The end of my attachment to an ‘idea’ that I’d held close for years.

This afternoon in the practice Kira led us through a mellow hip sequence, and into a tuned in seat where I connected the base of my skull.I’d been so focused on setting my ‘roots’ for the last months, the softness, and gold sensation was revelation in the spaciousness of the openning I experienced in my sleep.

We discussed the anatomy of the inhale, and the last few days, I can’t even stay in backbends.
They are usually a place I can stay for days, and the messages I am recieving are-‘back off’ ‘listen’.

My backbends have mirrored my ambitions, and a picture of what I think is pretty or attractive in the practice; and how I look in it. I have ‘mastered’ the pretty backbend, and all it’s variations, but why blast myself into the opening that isn’t rooted deep within?

As we alternated between ‘swamp monster’ and ‘?’, I felt my resistence to the super open expression, and how I’ve forced myself into it for so long. It’s so familiar to me to exaggerate ‘oh yeah, I’m open’.

I’m being driven not by my ambition to achieve, but by my ability to feel. The passage that occurred in my dream last night signalled an opening of a block. I’m feeling the space that is raw, and new. And pure.

Unlocked, Birthed

I’ve been having incredible dreams. And I listen to them.
A few weeks ago I had a dream that felt like it was a birth. I was oiled down, and holding an elongated cat dressed like a zen master. I slid my way through a long tunnel that went over a pontoon bridge I know from India. I slid out into the opening of a grand temple I knew was devoted to the Goddess Kali. The floor of the temple was strewn with flowers, prasad (sacred offerrings), and kumkum (red powder). The cracks in the stones were wet with blood.
As I looked ahead of me the ground was adorned with a giant chain swastika. I knew it was there so the devotees could chain themselves to resist being swept away by the rising of the Ganga river. Their sadhana(meditation) would not be disturbed.
The swastika started to spin, and as it spun, I knew it was time to put the cat down. Bells were ringing, and I could hear the chants all over the temple.
I looked to the left, and my entry has disappeared. The path to my left is open, broad, expansive-I’m welcome to leave.
I wake up.

This dream marked a birth for me. Into this.

The last few weeks have been a huge birth for ‘LuckyUschi’. And I am noticing my fear around it perhaps not being a birth in my teaching. This feels scary.

The summer schedule for Lulu’s is out. I’ve cut back my classes, and it feels right. But I am so aware that as my images are dissolving-that I need to be flexible, and let ‘LuckyUschi’ have a voice of it’s own. I am realizing that I am a new mother, and that I’m not used to this. My baby needs time to grow.

Last week things in my schedule needed to be rearranged to accomodate my arrival of boxes, and the streams of meeting and work on the computer that are occupying most of my time. The shift created the space for a great invitation. I am going to participate in Kira’s teacher training.

This is an anniversary for me.
In 2002 I participated in the 2nd training at Lulu’s. This birthed me into the path which has led here-through so much immense growth. Here, in 2009-I’ve come through this incredible tunnel-and I am going to learn to teach again, from my beloved teacher and friend.

I haven’t shared this with anyone. I want it to be a suprise to my friends who are also participating. I’m excited to be re-introduced to the practice that is my family at Lulu’s.and to be part of a new group of graduates of our school. It feels like I’m a mom going back to college-after the birth of her precious child.